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Whatever You Think About the Most, You Become

Updated: Apr 28, 2021

Have you ever heard the saying "Whatever you think about the most, you become?" Well I first heard this from a company owner at a conference. He followed up by saying "Well if that were true, I'd be a woman." Meaning that he thought about women a lot. It was funny at the time but I'd actually like to take this a step further.

To Be, Do and Have

When we think, it can sometimes feel that we don't have control over the process, right?! The thoughts going through our minds are coming and going less than a mile a minute and we can't even keep track of them all. Do we really slow down and focus on what we're thinking/telling ourselves? Are the thoughts for our good? Are they leading us in the direction we ultimately want to go in or are they stopping us? Anything stopping us becomes our limiting beliefs because we are afraid to go in that direction. Ultimately, we think/tell ourselves things to stop us from being, doing, and having. We may not always notice this, but we can end up focusing more of our time on things we don't want versus what we do want. To be, do and have, is to focus on what we DO want so that we can attract it into our lives; otherwise known as the law of attraction.


There was a time when I absolutely hated to write and that's exactly what I told myself. "I hate to write." Do you ever catch yourself saying "I can't, I don't, I won't, I hate, I suck at...?" when you think about that "thing" during a conversation, something you overhear, or even watch someone else do in person or on television? I call that a "push back" stemming from your limiting beliefs and overall resistance to something outside of your norm/comfort zone. And the more you think about that thing you can't be, do and/or have, you believe it and unconsciously don't become it/bring it into your life's experiences based on that belief.


So again, I hated to write and therefore, I didn't do it as often as I could/should in order to simply avoid the task because I also thought I couldn't do it well; until...one day when I thought I could. Taking the simple action of just beginning to write down what came to mind was writing and I was doing it. I was becoming someone who wrote. No matter how many words/characters there were, I was writing. Anything new to you that you repeatedly do is called practicing until you master it. And what does practicing over and over again build? Confidence! Writing over and over again simply by writing captions to my social media pages counted as writing and I felt I was starting to get good at it because every time I started, I got better. I was becoming a content writer via blogs as well, and even an original quote creator. Doing this thing called writing over and over again (creating) is what built the confidence that I CAN write and so I became an author by doing the work to write and edit multiple chapters. Now I have a book that I offer with lessons learned from my own personal experiences to encourage and inspire women to know that they can be, do and have anything that they want if they focus on what they get to be, do, and have instead of what they don't.


The Law of Attraction is Real

I don't think I really understood the power of the law of attraction until recently. With the upcoming release of Battling the Flames, I was already thinking about how I could begin to brand myself leveraging the book/my story with the ultimate dream of what I wanted to become, in mind. A motivational speaker! It was the next thing that I was starting to think about the most,. Why was it that, not even a few weeks later, I opened my Instagram page, and looked across the top of the screen to see that someone had posted to their stories and it caught my attention. It wasn't someone I recognized because I hadn't seen any of his posts before but clearly I had been following him. When I opened his page, I learned that he was a speaker coach that I had followed MONTHS ago. Guess what?! He was offering a great deal on a speaker workshop. When I learned this, I got goosebumps since seriously getting into speaking was all that was on my mind lately. Of course I said "YES" to myself and signed up for the workshop which was a great start. However, I wanted more; so I invested in 1:1 coaching with him to get help with my signature message. I then started practicing that message with no particular opportunity in sight yet; just practicing to build up my confidence. Then, within a matter of weeks, I saw a sponsor on Instagram about being a speaker for E.R. Spaulding's BlackWoman Confidential Conference. Once again, I said "YES" and auditioned to be one of her conference speakers and got accepted. This lead to me working with my speaker coach again, on a more targeted message. I'm happy to say that my Voices of Purpose Keynote Speaker message aired this past Tuesday during the conference that thousands of women heard. "This message is powerful on so many levels. I had goosebumps the entire time." is what one watcher commented. I had practiced my speaker message over and over again and thought, this is how the greats do it. They just keep practicing until they master it. Just like any habit I coach my clients to form, it takes repetition to master! That was my experience and it felt so damn good - comfortable, confident, and bold to share my message with everyone. The experience definitely sealed the deal for me by confirming that this is what I also want to be (a motivational speaker), have (a speaking business to inspire/help women into their futures) and do (speak to thousands) and so I am pursuing my speaker business on top of growing my coaching practice and authoring more books!


What Do You Want to Be, Do and Have?

Sharing my experiences is never to brag and/or boast. While yes, if it's an accomplishment, I'm no longer afraid to share because not sharing is dimming my light and not helping anyone. I vowed never to do that again. Every time I share something about myself - who I am being, doing, or what I have, it's to motivate, inspire, and maybe even irritate, if that is how some take it, others into action because we really can be, do and/or have whatever we think about the most! I so have a vision for those who I work with and want them to be, do, and have whatever it is they want in their life. If I can do that by sharing "me" in hopes that it will help others, I will keep doing it, unapologetically. I hope you (can) feel the same way about yourself.


What do you want to be, do, and/or have that you haven't yet realized? It can be anything. You might say, "Well, Kenya, I am, do, and have everything that I want!" I say to you "That's great and what would be even better if?" We can be satisfied/content with where we are in life but what is it that you still think about? And out of everything that you still think about, what do you think about the most? Whatever that thing is, it's what's tugging at your heartstrings as the even better if that you can be, do and/or have. I want you to give this some thought, and then I want you to think about it some more, and more, and more. This is what you will begin to attract (more of) in your life. What's most important is that you recognize it when it appears and what you decide to do with it once you attract it. Will you say "YES"?


If anything I've shared resonated with you or you have blog topic recommendations, I welcome you to leave a comment below.


To learn about upcoming events: Events | Kenya Carr


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